At shy of 11 months Ashton, you are taking off. You are zipping and zooming pushing anything with or without wheels to get you across a room. I am again reminded how different you and your brother are. He was and is an observer. You are our daredevil, the go-getter. You want what you want and it usually means: now. Kaden took until he was a year old to get the courage to do this action. I have been denying it to you in fear of my baby leaving.
Daddy and I saw you take your first steps as you held onto a little red motorcycle. You walked along side it just as any rider does. You did so with confidence. Dad grabbed my attention to watch the action. I quickly walked over to you to make sure you didn’t fall. Although, Dad jokes it was to knock you down. He knows this Mama isn’t ready for you to be a walking boy.
A few days later, you grabbed onto a stand and play table pushing it back and forth across the room. You did so effortlessly. You were laughing and almost bouncing as you did it to the beat of the music. Proud Dad started recording the pitter pat of feet. I turned my back and started bawling. I couldn’t control the tears. It was bitter sweet.
I want you to excel. I want you to reach for new horizons. I want you to grow and challenge yourself. I want this for both of you, boys. This being said, can you do all these great wonderful things at the schedule of my comfort ability? This Mom needs a break. I have been in a baby whirlwind and now that things are finally balanced I want to breathe in these baby moments. I don’t want you to be little forever. Believe it or not, I do have plans of my own one day. What I do want is to savor this special time. We were expecting you, so I couldn’t wait for Kaden to walk. I was rush- rush-rush about it. I wanted and needed to fast forward to ensure he was walking by your birth. Now, I want to hit pause for a moment and then slow things down.
I know, soon enough you will be leaving the building. I hear all too often how fast the time goes. I believe it. I shake my head imagining how fast these years will go. Can you give your Mom a break? Can you make these last few weeks leading up to your birthday pure babydum? At day 366, you have my blessing to find your balance and walk into your world… But for now, for these weeks I need this. I need my baby to be a baby. I need you to crawl and yank on my pant leg for a bottle not walk around the furniture to grab a juice cup. I ask a lot. I know.
Okay, I am the Mom. Let me be honest and of course there is no guilt intended, but you DO still wear 6-9 month clothing. This IS infant wear. Let us face it- infants are not supposed to walk. Sorry, baby. Plus, they (whoever ‘they’ are) say, the longer you take the walk the better… I don’t know why this is, but it is. Heed the advice. Please.
**I just realized these toys making you magically walk were given to you by the Church’s for Christmas… I may have to inquire to Grandma.
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