As a Mom there is an abundance of rules to follow. I cannot
keep up with the forever evolving list. I will preface that these rules were
not made by Mom or typically enforced by Mom.
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Always, ALWAYS ask if a sandwich should be cut in half.
Do not assume it is in rectangles as triangles do exist. Lunches can get crazy
and at time these halves turn into quarters. Be aware. You never know when
crazy happens. Ask.
-
Fat, ugly, stop, kiss and but are all words we are not
allowed to say. Be vigilant as this list changes minute-by-minute.
-
I have been told toilets should not have seats. It is
the seats fault as to why urine spots it, not the peeing boy who chose not to
lift it. Thus, remember to look before you sit each and every time.
-
Give privacy when they are using the potty. If you
should enter expect a verbal lashing. They will leave the toilet to close the
door and lock it. Soon they will get up open the door and scream “MOM!” down
the hallway. Time to wipe said private bottom.
-
They can swim in the rain because they are already wet.
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If they have not watched the DVD or VHS movie 462 times
do not suggest or play another movie. Night ruined.
-
Baths are oceans, pools, lakes and places to get
married. The thoughtful splashing is to help encourage mopping of the floors
(hallway included).
-
Rain boots are to be worn throughout the winter and
cowboy boots are designated summer wear. This footwear is all that should
exist.
-
The word no is code to continue the behavior or
repeating of words as if they are battling Turrets.
-
Do not hold hands to cross the street or parking lot.
Dealing with big boys.
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“Hold me! Hold me! Hold me! I just saw a mosquito!”
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7:00pm no one is hungry, therefore movie begins.
7:00:45 same children are famished.
Their list goes on and on as does my laughter. I admit to being the habitual rule
breaker. I am doing my best to do better, but there is a learning curve called
four and five.
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